Boy, do I understand this feeling in sooooo many ways!
I want my therapist to remember what she has promised me. I don't want to hear excuses or apologies. I don't want to have to remind her to do something that she promised to do. I have to deal with that in friendships, I don't want to deal with it in my therapeutic relationship!

What has been healing for me, is to have a therapist who is fierce in her determination to keep her commitments to me and most likely her other clients. I'm not saying she hasn't "forgotten" a promise. She has, but it NEVER happens a second time. She is unbelievable about accepting my criticisms of her "failures" in the relationship (not that there has been many), and I can't say that I've ever had someone apologize with the same level of genuineness and honesty as I've received from her. This is one of the greatest things she's taught me in our work together--it's okay to make a mistake, but make sure your apology is genuine and from the heart AND that you don't make the same mistake again. Through her behavior, she has also taught me to take responsibility for my part in any failures/disconnects in our relationship--this was an important lesson for me and one I probably wouldn't have learned if I hadn't had her role model the behavior for me.

I know that she keeps very careful notes of what she has promised me (if it's a book I want to borrow, a show she wants me to watch, a song that I've asked her to listen to and talk to me about, a note for when she was away, a special object from her office that she gives me to "hold onto" when I was particularly vulnerable), she remembers.

I really think you need to have a heart to heart talk with her. Don't skip the session! This is a perfect opportunity to move to the next level in your relationship with her. Let her know that the failures have been hurtful and confusing to you. I hope she ends up sending you the note and giving you the reassurance you need!