I call it chasing the high. I know that is a phrase drug addicts use, but I feel that it is the same for me. Chasing the high mood of mania.
It is hard to feel so great and then so bad. I know. But Is there anything negative that you can remember about your last hypomanic state?

I have 2 kids. That keep me on meds when I am tempted to go off. What about your wife?
Zyprexa made me feel really drugged. Maybe you can try switching meds?