Emotionally/mentally I feel stuck. I feel trapped in my own life, with nothing to do but continue through it in this weird disconnected state. All I want is to feel balance, to feel content. I don't even care very much if I am 'happy', I just want to feel at peace.

During small moments (too few and far between) I am able to obtain it; peace. That scares me- like- maybe this is as good as it gets, and the moments of peace will be harder and harder to come by. That idea really makes me feel panicky. It makes me want to say **** it.