One of my good friend's son is getting married in June and I was invited to the shower today. I am glad I was able to go and meet Julia but other than that I could have spent my time doing something else I think. I felt very out of place and sat and watched Julia open her presents for awhile and talked to another friend's mom and left. I don't know why I felt compelled to go. I got depressed after leaving because John David is just getting out of college and bam he will be married. By the time the couple is my age they probably will have a couple of kids and be all happy. What have I got at my age NOTHING!!!! I have no one to love like that...I have no kids. All my life all I have wanted is to be married and to be a mom. Doesn't look like either one is going to happen. So all my life I have been wanting something that will never happen what good has that done me?

Yes I'm having a pity party right now but gosh darn I think I deserve it.

Jbug