Going to have to call Pdoc if this keeps up. I'm depressed again. Wanting to sleep and cry that's it. I would rather be high. I'm tempted to just stop taking meds to go back up. With or without Pdoc approval. I'm doubting everything. I'm finding it really hard to find a positive thing anywhere. Need to meditate and center myself which doesn't seem to be possible. I just hate this if this is me. And self doubt is raging. I'm lost. Negative thoughts taking over. Fml.