I'm willing to stand up for myself, assert my boundaries, and end the friendship. But I'm not willing to throw in the towel on a group I've spent 2 years building from the ground up, ruin my chances at tenure, or ruin the possibility of being hired at a better University (which would also get me away from her!) I've worked SO HARD to be a professor by 29; I'm not willing to ruin all of that because someone is bothering me. If it were a matter of life or death or something, yes, that would come before my career. But I won't let this woman ruin my career and I don't think just "stepping away" is the best way to stand up for myself.