You don't have a boyfriend. You've adopted a child. As long as you stay with him, there is no hope of him starting to grow up. So do yourself and him a big favor and get out. Consider the 5K a gift and forget about it. 5K is not a lot to pay to learn a big lesson. (I've been in your shoes and it doesn't get better with time.)

Once you leave, he will be looking for another woman to take him in, and he'll be likely to find one. He'll bleed her like he's bleeding you, until he wears that situation out. You can not fix him. Save yourself. That is not selfish. That is being responsible. You have the stuff to make a nice life for yourself. Stay with him and you will be dragged down and may ruin your whole life. He genuinely may not be capable of being any different from how he is. I'm all for accepting that people often can't help how they are. That doesn't mean that you have to appoint yourself his personal savior.

There's tons of good advice above. Get free of this guy. Somewhere out there is a guy who shares your values about being responsible. You would be a good catch for a good guy. Don't waste yourself. Don't waste your life. And, if you have any hopes of ever having children, don't burden your future children with this hopeless specimen for a father.

I totally get that you love him. Life is not only about love. Being in love is not a good enough reason to stay with someone. Right now you don't see that. Someday you will. There has to be shared values. Self-sacrifice can be very noble in certain contexts. This is not one of those contexts. This is nothing but a trap. And don't delude yourself into thinking that at least you're saving him. You are getting between him and what slim hope there is of him growing up.

If you extricate yourself from this relationship, then your main challenge is to not get into another similar relationship. That will be hard for you to avoid. Needy men can spot a gal like you from a mile away.

I used to pride myself on not being "materialistic." That is dumb thinking. Concerns about material things are appropriate and mature people take those concerns seriously.

And don't keep buying the b.s. about people "deceiving" him. If that is happening to him, it's because he won't grow up and separate real offers from fantasies. He lets himself be deceived because he'ld rather live in that alternative universe that is divorced from reality.

Good luck. You sound like a fine person who can have a great future, IF you decide not to let that be taken from you.