I know this feeling really well. It's been my reality or unreality in the past. It's a horrible place to be. My former therapist was very similar to yours. She just stayed steady and waited me out in a very supportive way. If I quit, she didn't pressure me to return, but when I would call to "unquit" there was always an appointment available to me. When I reached the appointment, she never shamed me or scolded me about wasting her time. We'd simply pick up were we left off, processing what happened and how to work toward calming the storm.

I call it a storm because that's what it felt like to me. A storm of emotion. I often compared it to a wild sand storm. It stung and hurt when I was in the thick of it, and the sand was so heavy and wild, swirling around me, that I couldn't see or think straight. But what I learned is that I always came out the other side. ALWAYS.

When things calm down for you, Hazelgirl, I really encourage you to seek out DBT. My therapist wasn't trained in it, but she was very supportive of me teaching myself the skills. There wasn't a group in my area, but I found a site on line, bought Marsha Linhan's workbook and I worked that thing like crazy. If I needed to talk about a skill and practice it in session, my therapist helped me with that. Did DBT cure me? No, my relationship with my therapist helped me find stability, but the DBT enhanced that relationship and calmed my storms significantly.

Go to your appointment. You will come out the other side of this storm.