September 16th and it's almost noon. I have job interview today that I desperatlely need to get.
Not sure if I should have a shot or 2 of tequila to calm my nerves.
I want to but seems like I don't know how to only have a drink or two and I can't end up being drunk today I don't even have milk for the baby.
I keep getting anxiety not sure if it's cuz I'm crazy or if mabe it's just withdrawals.
I'm happy with my life except I'm financially screwed. I love my husband kids and home. I just need a ****ing job.
I keep getting stupid thought in my head about slicing my wrist I'm not sucidal at all just keep getting those stupid visions again.. I hate them they make me feel crazy. Yesterday I was cutting an onion and decided it be best to put the knife down WTf u nutcase. I'm craving for a bout of mania I just know if I could trigger it some how everything will be better.