What the hell? You were defending yourself! You didn't exactly intend on what you did.. she was strangling you, twice. Oh, but she can't forgive you for defending yourself? Christ. Dear lord.. that's a very disturbing story. I'd say get her some psychiatric help before she really hurts somebody, or worse. I hope you can get some solutions here; sounds like a nightmare. Maybe some sort of midlife crisis? Sorry if I seem unsympathetic - that's just a very shocking and worrying story! Best of luck.

PS
I have to agree with the member that pointed out the legal minefield that could ensue. The last thing you want is for her to have the audacity to try to pin a crime on you, when she was the one damn-near trying to kill you! I know you love her, but I think it's time to take a step back and look out for number #1; just my view, of course. I would actually report this to the police immediately, just in-case she does try to pull some twisted legal move on you.