I haven't been diagnosed bipolar but feel that I might be for a variety of reasons. My doctors say I have bipolar components (agitation and paranoia are the most pronounced as far as they know).

But I felt the Topamax slowed me down too much at work last week. I skipped it today. I should give it a good, honest shot because I have to be honest -- I didn't blow through 3/4 of my savings this summer solely out of depression. I'd have felt way too guilty/not had the motivation to spend that much money. And I live at home and don't pay rent so . . . I really need to figure something out to get that sort of behavior under control. I'm supposed to be saving up to move in with my boyfriend. I was honest with him and told him about it.

That slowed down side effect goes away for some. I'm just used to being a machine when I'm working. I hate stuttering along. I have to give it a few more weeks, I'm just experiencing a dilemma over it.