Been there too. So many of us have been there! To be or not to be. For me, I'm afraid of living and I'm afraid of dying because I don't know what happens after death, and it's sooo final. Can't change your mind or take it back once it's done. I've been lucky tho, the main reason I don't give up is because it would devastate my wife and children. I am the sole bread winner. I worry what would happen to them and what kind of emotional scars it would leave my children. I think that is the key. Try to find something worth the effort to keep trying. At least that has worked for me so far.