The therapist is training you to respond to the style used by the therapist,therapy is in practice 'corrective retraining',if you are being activated by the method,whether you like the technique or not,and this is making some form of idea rise to awareness then the effect is what you want,the essential need for respect must be there,look behind the interactive technique-eye contact,head up,open ended statements...ask yourself if you feel reassured by the attitude,it is not needed to bond with the therapist and you need to feel they know what they are doing-this layering of impressions has it's own pace and there does not have to be a conclusion-sometimes there just is not enough data to decide what something could mean.If your material upsets her but doesn't upset you then look for the cause of the variance.