. . . slipping back into a "light" depression. I was looking over optimism online and I see a wave effect going on over a few months. The thing is, it is not "major" ups and downs, just enough to make things wrong for me (if that makes sense). In the back of my mind I keep telling myself it is just "normal" behavior, it is just like anyone else to have these smaller fluctuations. I am just wondering if I am trying to convince myself so. I REALLY don't want to call my pdoc. I'm honestly scared my 2 year run is coming to an end. I'm terrified that I am going to slip into the abyss again. I'm afraid of a med change, I want to stay level. When I think about it, I start freaking out. I feel llike maybe I need to call, but then again, what if I am reading to much into it? Ugh, I just want to hide away .