I’ve been bullied at work by the Vice President of a global company for the last year. After some counselling and research on the internet, I finally managed to organise a meeting to talk about some of the issues with him. Although I explained that I was comfortable with my abilities and felt that he wasn’t comfortable with my abilities he replied that I was paranoid to my face a number of times.

The project I am working on is becoming successful in the US but I have some concerns it will not come to the UK where I live so I organised a meeting to ask formal questions about the future of the product and my future at the company. Most of the questions were answered fairly well apart from the questions about my future. He said that I do not want to do some of the work he suggests at times. I said that this was not true of me and I asked for examples which he couldn’t give. He also said if the product did not come to the UK, I would still be in my role working globally. So ok, I would still have a job.

He also mentioned that I wasn’t easy to read, at the same time watching me for quite a while. He explained that his management style was to test the waters with people and to see how they react. I suggested that I would prefer a more direct approach. He also said repeatedly he would not change to be more direct and I had to change. He said I needed to start reading him. I now know that bullies play mind games to control other people. As he said I wasn’t easy to read is he failing to control me ?

I want the bullying to stop and I don’t want to play any mind games. I realised what kind of person he was a while ago and I have made sure I have not been readable. Going forwards I want to ensure I am not affected by his bullying and I have also started looking for another job. I will be sad to leave some good colleagues. I will miss the thrill of working on this project. It has brought out the best in me and the best work I feel I have ever done. I queried my pay increase with HR and they confirmed that anything above X% (she told me what X% was) was considered good. HR said that they noticed on the list at the time that my pay rise was good. It was approx. 2.5 times greater than the X% figure.

I’m confused. Looking for some insight as to what is occurring, why and how best to deal.

Thank you