We have talked about it pretty frequently.

When I was in so much distress yesterday, for example, she'd recommend going and doing something nurturing, and I'd say investing in this conversation IS what I'm doing to be nurturing. As she tried to help me brainstorm I'd tell her what I really need is just the calm I get from your company, I just want to do an exercise with you to get back to my baseline.

So some of the talk is process talk- how to make the most of our relationship.

Some of the talk is more what you might be referring to, talking about what she means to me, the nature and quality of our relationship, and about any little misunderstandings or concerns I have. So, we talk about her in a good-enough-mother role, which is just being there consistently for me, making herself available a lot, giving lots of (virtual) hugs, helping me with all my parenting worries, sending me songs to show she cares and help me through rough spots, etc. I've even broached the L word a couple of times, and she tells me she cares about me very deeply, and she's talked a little indirectly about the love in this type of relationship, as a good-enough-mother figure. (She had 10 years of therapy with her previous therapist and considered that her own re-parenting relationship, so that's part of her foundation too.)

I can relate to your anxiety about focusing on it too much: I was definitely worried about oversharing about our relationship early on. It was probably at the.... six month mark (thought I was doing like 3 sessions a week, so maybe that's like the 18 month mark lol) that I told her how important it was for me to have a reliable figure like her in my life and kind of dumped my history of broken connections with maternal figures on her. I felt it was a lot to venture, but.... after a while I got over most of the fear of rejection, of being too much. Part of that process was her encouraging me to always tell her how I felt about her, if I was angry, etc. So her openness was a huge help. She also says things like how honored she is to work with me that really helps me feel.... at least marginally more comfortable referring to our relationship and making it less like a doctor visit and more like a mentor or counselor, something a little more intimate and casual.

Anyhow, not sure how much of that is helpful, but if there's anything more specific you had in mind, I'm happy to answer.