This past week I was in Tennessee with my sister visiting our mom in the hospital who needed open heart surgery. she's in renal failure due to drugs and alcohol so this only gave her a chance to live a little longer. she almost died on the table. the doctors said she probably would. she ended up making it through the surgery and is doing ok. I came back Tuesday night and found out that my tdoc who I've known since I was a child died last Friday morning. he was swimming in the ocean and was stung by a jellyfish. he had an allergic reaction and basically suffocated. he was all alone and it just seems like he had to die in order to live and he probably deserved life more. I had so many things to tell him last night when I was supposed to see him... but now he's gone and j have no one to talk to who understands me like he did