Hi surfacetoair, I wouldn't say that taking lithium would make you a failure in any way at all
Maybe the whole way it was prescribed didn't help either i.e. the "threat" of the hospital if you didn't try it??
But.......the maintenance medications you've accepted.........well that is pretty much what lithium is anyway......a stabilizer. And it doesn't need to mean that you're so "ill" that you may need lithium.........it more means that might just so happen to be the medication to help you in being "well". It seriously doesn't have to define you in any way that lithium may work for you.
Different medications work for different people and the most important thing is that you have the medication/s to help you, no matter what that is.
But if you feel it's temporary and you need different support or medications then maybe just write down before your appointment everything that makes you feel that, the more information they get the better anyway, right?? And if after all of that they are still suggesting lithium then get them to fully explain why and a bit more about the medication. Afterall if you were to take it you want to know why and be doing it for more reasons than an alternate to the hospital.
But explaining what's going on for you might also make them rethink/reassess what you actually need???

Alison