Whenever I start seeing new therapists I always HATE it for at least a few visits because it doesn't seem like we connect. I'll give a new therapist 4 to 6 visits before moving on, unless they're disrespectful or making me feel much worse about myself than I already do. It can take a while for the relationship to work. Also, the happy pills keep me alive. If I didn't have them, I'd be toast. Right now I'm trying a new one and it's not working super well but it's keeping me from self-harming, at least, and it doesn't have any nasty side effects. It's a little scary to try new happy pills and then frustrating to need to have them tweaked, but it beats hanging out at the hospital.

Therapy and happy pills might help you get to a better place. The drinking (which I can also relate to) won't, at least not in the long run. Sounds like maybe focusing on one thing at a time - the drinking, the job situation, the living at home situation - and gradually working on things instead of trying to make sweeping changes all at once might be helpful as well. Depression makes it all seem so overwhelming, like you're fed up and want things to change but then when you think about taking action it is just too hard to do it all. Also, depressed or not, long-time habits and personal tendencies don't get switched on and off like a light switch.

Keep posting on here. Stuff gets read and replied to usually, and it can really help.