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Hellion
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Member Since Apr 2010
Location: Colorado
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Default Sep 18, 2014 at 08:00 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by waterknob1234 View Post
Hi Hellion, I have had the suicide ideation as well. I will find my mind drifting into thoughts of it from time to time. I also try not to talk about it with people around me. I find all sorts of reasons not to do suicide, especially how it would affect my family. But that doesn't mean I don't think about it. In fact I think about it probably too often. I wish I knew a good answer for us. Last week I went to see the nurse practitioner at the neurologist office. I was telling her that I was having a terrible time with migraine headaches and that if they did not stop I would be almost suicidal. She asked in serious shock if I was suicidal. I decided then to shut up because I had a trip planned that weekend to visit my son for his birthday and I did not want to be sent to a mental hospital. Then I thought to myself, if she only really knew. There were times I thought about it, but I don't think I would ever really do it.

I can't do much but sending hugs your way.
I've been in the psych ward twice because of thinking about it, so yeah sometimes when I have plans like to do something I hope to enjoy or spend time with someone I might not be entirely honest about how crappy I feel in therapy as don't so much like the idea of having to go again...I would tell someone or go to ER if in immediate danger like for sure on the verge of attempting. I have unfortunately done more than thought about it so it does worry me when I have a lot of suicidal thinking.

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