View Single Post
 
Old Sep 18, 2014, 11:56 PM
Leah123's Avatar
Leah123 Leah123 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Washington
Posts: 3,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by archipelago View Post
It's a general question I guess though I am having a specific problem with this that I have recognized before but it is really clear right now.

In the process of doing therapy, I've learned about how to talk things through, even if difficult, and get to an understanding. It may be hard for various reasons, but the result tends to make it worth the effort.

When I have tried to do this outside therapy with people who have not been exposed to therapy or who are not open to this sort of thing, I've been very frustrated, sometimes upset, and usually disappointed. It just doesn't seem to work out that well. Sometimes I even regret trying because it makes things worse.

I don't know if it is just my own experience, and if so what I need to do about it. Or maybe others have had this happen too?

Or maybe others have had positive results? Then maybe I could learn something about how that happens.
It's become easier for me to speak with my husband, daughter and other family and acquaintances since I've been working on discussing difficult topics and unburdening myself in therapy.

It's been challenging and scary at times but rewarding.

It's helped that I'd already eliminated toxic people from my life- did that work years ago, so I'm dealing with people who really love me and are committed to me as well as discovering through my attempts that people I know have more in common with me than I expected in terms of having difficult pasts and struggles. Therapy's helped me take of the 'everything's fine and I don't need anyone' mask, so it's been a big help, rewarding if not easy.
Thanks for this!
Aloneandafraid