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if I say yes, they want me to show them

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That is so untrusting. Is it your therapist who is wanting you to show her? Why wouldn't she trust you if you said "yes"? Why does she actually have to view the cuts herself? I would ask her that next time. Sounds like she has trust issues. Usually it is the client with the trust issues. I'm so sorry you're going through this. My own experience with SI was that I wanted to keep it very, very secret. It would have been torture for me to have been forced to reveal it to someone, and then to have them slap me in the face by saying I was doing it for attention--they couldn't get much further off the mark than that. I see your dilemma. It sounds to me like the people who are supposed to be trying to help you don't really know what they're doing. Can you share with your therapist your message here? To make her understand better? And ask her not to demand you show your wounds? That's so demeaning. Just not healing at all. ((((Hugs))))

sunny