Quote:
Originally Posted by A Red Panda
A lot of people don't get hugged often by friends. Some people are huggy and openly affectionate to their friends, but a lot of people aren't.
She may have thought of something like that when she said she wasn't giving you a hug because you didn't really need one. You just wanted one at that point to feel closer to her - and it was a wise decision for her to not encourage it really.
I would be upset to if someone told me that now I'd deserved a hug. It would have been more accurate to say "After that conversation, it sounds like you actually need a hug now".
It's good that you're able to ask someone for a hug when you feel you want one. That can be hard to do! But asking LC and using her as your sole source of affecion isn't healthy, and she's aware of that. While you don't have a bf, you can start seeking out more affection from your friends (whether it involves hugs or not).
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Affection from friends. The ones that don't like hugging also don't like verbal affection. The non hugger I tend to "annoy" with poking and light mocking. The other friend I will sometimes lie next to when we watch a video online or something which is big for me because I feel very nervous normally when lying down near someone. I will hug her too.
My new teacher will touch my shoulder sometimes when he is saying something important or joking. It's different because I'm usually a little more jumpy about something like that. An older man around my dad's age and height touching me at all? Yeah, I actually don't know why I'm not bothered by it. I'm either getting better or I just feel safe when I play. I know I do use music as a shield now and again. If it were any other man fitting his description but outside of music, I would be upset at the idea of just meeting with him alone like I do. I guess I just trust him because my teachers have always been my biggest healthy father figures.
Anyway, I was texting LCM about my loser intern. In my session today with loser intern, we sat in silence for about 20 mins. I told LCM. She joked that maybe she should try that. After I told her she could never be quiet for 20 mins because that would require not speaking, I imagined leaning on her shoulder and saying nothing for 20 mins. I guess maybe that kind of touch that I imagined is what she wants to discourage with only hugging randomly.