thanks for everyone who has replied for me. i stayed home just to see if someone has replied, hoping that someone can stop me. as for shelters, and all other plans of running away, i cannot do them, because i have too much of an academic obligation going on for me right now. i am in this program called IB, and not many highschools support it. school is all i care about, and if i run away, well, i'm not really sure if they'll have higher programs offered to girls who ran away.

i have thought of an alternative. malicious, maybe, but it's a sweet revenge. you get back what you give, no? one way to return the rage, anger, tiredness, depression and torture is perhaps to do it back to my parents. all of you talked about 'planning an escape'. that was a very wise advice, thank you, and while thinking about it i found that i just have too much to lose even then. it would be too much of a distraction from my schoolwork. instead of me losing things in life, i decided that i make THEM lose things in life. I will act like a ghost in this house that causes mysterious disappearances or breakage of items that previously worked. that, is my 'plan', and i will pour my energy on that, starting today. it will definitely make me feel better. ideas will be appreciated.

i think it's ridiculous that the abuse has gotten me to go this far, but it is far better than running away and losing everything in my life. may misery loom upon them from now on.

<div class="foot">(Edited by r2rsd on 08/19/04 03:04 PM.)</div>