i have read your replies and i thank you all for taking time out to read my post and reply.

well, i really do need help. i needed help when i joined this forum and that would be 5 years ago! and i still need help. situations were a bit different at that time, as my major problem back then was not being able to study and having crush on unavailable boys but i had realized that all this was because of not having the right attitude towards life! i was desperate to get approval of my family and colleagues and teachers and ofcourse of the guys i used to like from time to time. and i realized yesterday that the issue is still the same! i feel angry..yes..and may be that is not so bad..but i tend to EXPRESS my anger EVERYDAY DAMN TIME! :/ and that just ruins everything!!! i cant afford therapy so now im looking for articles online to help me get better control on my anger issues. wish me luck