Although you're going through depression, I must say you come across as a strong person, and i think you really are. Breaking off an abusive relationship takes courage. And you had it.
I'm sorry for your losses. I could see you cared for both of them.
It's good you're trying to recover, and if you don't like your present therapist, i hope you find a good one soon.
Try seeing the good aspects of life, as much as you can ^_^
Hope your yard looks better *huuug*