Yeah, I tend to switch my self destructive behaviors pretty often- almost like I'm bored with this lets try stg new... I don't see drinking as that big of deal- but that's not saying it isn't. Just that they are far worse things you could be doing...
I really think at this point I'd just pick a T I could stand and go with him/her. You could still be looking for your TT. You do need help ASAP not to end up in a hospital. Plus, if I remember it correctly, you're on a dry floor...