I was in a deep dark confusing depression for about 5 months. I came out and was feeling like I used to in a lot of ways and generally like I could cope. It's been a little more than a month now and the anxiety and insecurity, the cognitive decline and the alientation, well they are back and Im finding myself sitting here in the house not knowing what to do with myself. Like I've forgotten how to relax and have a good time!

I just feel directionless after this last episode. Its disturbing. I have coping mechanisms but it seems how to implement them escpaes me when I need them the most.

I was on the med merry-go-round. I don't know... it helped. I'm better than I was for sure. I want to connect though and am striving for it with my family and friends. It's lonely.