Lost, I'm really sorry to hear how your family is in such misery. It's time for some tough talk here. You need to get a therapist and work on learning to accept your daughter's actions before your entire family is destroyed. Not by her. But by everyone's reaction to what she's done.

Unless you and your husband accept the fact that you are powerless in this situation, your health, marriage and other children are going to suffer in ways that simply aren't worth it.

I know you love your daughter. But what about the rest of your family? What about you?

There comes a point where love can turn toxic. It's become toxic to your own health and well-being. Your other children are probably worried sick that you're having a breakdown and may not recover. If your runaway daughter refuses to cooperate, there is nothing you can do about it. But you can take care of yourself so that your other children don't have to worry about ... well, quite honestly, about you having to be hospitalized or even dying.

Your shock and grief has turned into despair and desperation, obsession and depression. These are big emotions, too big for anyone to handle without help.

You may need a referral to a psychiatrist for medication and a therapist to help you accept that somehow there's been a fracture in your relationship with your daughter and as long as your emotions are so out of control there's no hope of mending that fracture.

You have been in my thoughts every single day because I know you are suffering. I've prayed for your daughter's safety. Now, I'm praying for your safety and recovery from this state of despair and desperation.

My thoughts are with you. Please get whatever help you can. I'm beginning to think your life is depending on it.