It's hard to tell from your brief post whether it's abuse if your spouse is lying to you. They could be lying to cover up infidelity, gambling or other addictions or actually just trying to hurt you via messing with your mind.

Therapy might be a way for you to sort through what's going on from your perspective and help you identify what steps to take next.

And leavings isn't as easy as it sounds. Usually the abuser has weakened the abused spouse so much mentally that it takes significant courage and a concrete plan (with a focus on the future without abuse as a reality) and outside support to get to a point where getting out is the option.

Best wishes and keep us up to date!