Hi. You seem to already have a lot of insight into all of this. So, basically if bad things happen to people they respond in one of 3 ways - people most commonly label them as fight or flight (but this is only two). So, some people fight, some people run away, and then there are those of us who freeze. All of these are biological reactions.
Denial is a huge factor in why you probably did not react so strongly at first, or even ever. It is no longer a criteria in the DSM because it has been labeled insignificant. I find that especially at a young age, people are less equipped to deal with the trauma and just try to ignore it. Personally, I am still trying to piece back together my junior year of highschool because I have a lot of memory loss/blockage from that time in my life.
Even if you had consented at 17, the huge age gap makes for a statutory rape scenario (even if legally it may not have been). But you didn't consent. He didn't ask and you froze. I personally struggle with the freezing piece, it really angers me because I reacted like that. I know it is irrational but it doesn't help any. You were still a child (17 is still a child) and this was a grown man and he did not ask you. He raped you. And if you had said no it would most likely not have made any difference. I mean freezing up isn't exactly how someone communicates they want to have sex. It's the whole paralyzed by fear thing. And it probably had a lot to do with the attack when you were 14.
Trust issues are really common, and you may consider talking with a therapist. I literally just got this website from an elder member when I posted yesterday. It talks about PTSD and complex PTSD. I dont know if you have either, but you may want to look at it: Complex post traumatic stress disorder (complex ptsd, pdsd, shell shock, nervous shock, combat fatigue), symptoms and the difference between mental illness and psychiatric injury explained
Feel free to message me if you want to talk.