(((vonmoxie))), I hear what you are saying about how the depression that takes place with PTSD is different.

What I honestly feel is taking place with you is that you are/have been consistently triggered by the very environment dysfunction that hurt you to begin with and that has been presented to you by your mother.

I have a thread going about Clutter/overwhelm taking place in me and how I have not been able to reclaim my home as I had before. I talk about a room and wanting to finish it but I get very "depressed" and I actually avoid finishing it and it is very hard to explain what happens that I have been "avoiding it and don't know why that is taking place in my brain". However, I also feel this reaction physically too, like a cloak of depression comes over me without my even thinking about it.

I can't help remembering how you talked about how this problem got so much worse when you moved back home and to your home town too. Also how your mother's way of interacting with you is also zapping your strength as well. I have these challenges myself and yes, it can be debilitating at times, and very hard to understand and explain to others.

I do know it helps to talk about it, even understand it better, but I do not know if that alone is a cure. I have gained some ground, but it has been slow and I can't really say that I have "fixed" the problem "yet", I do know it is real and misunderstood by others.