I have struggled with binge-eating for the past couple of months now. I never really thought that binging was this bad. "Oh, they just eat more than normal"... Boy was I wrong. I feel like the only thing I can compare myself to is a vacuum-cleaner vacuuming up a box of spilled cheerios on a wood floor. First I will eat a protein bar, but I am still hungry so I will eat nuts, because nuts are good for you right? Except I'll eat an entire container of nuts, then I'll go to the fridge and eat pounds of fruit (trying to be healthy here) but then I go for the mint ice-cream in the fridge because oh my goodness it is so delicious, then I'll eat all my left overs, popsicles, then I head back to the pantry and start eating more protein bars (these things are loaded in the calorie department... and probably loads of chemicals) granola bars, dried fruit, bananas, apples, saltines, bread, more, more, more... By the time I realize how much I've eaten I am LIVID at my myself, I feel sick to my stomach, and I look pregnant with triplets. Man... this is difficult stuff! I've always been thin, and had a small appetite, I could eat whatever I wanted, but I never wanted THAT much or ate THAT often. For the past few months (for emotional reasons, or due to cravings caused by birth control... have yet to distinguish the culprit of these hellish cravings) I have had an endless appetite. Literally my stomach has turned from a little girls satisfied by a few bites tummy to an endless pit. I have never had such a struggle trying not to eat, because once I start I seriously cannot stop and it terrifies me. I have gained too much because of Binge-Eating.. I am working with a therapist now, but we just met last week for the first time so I'm not exactly doing anything differently. I have severe body image issues and I can't even bear to look at myself in the mirror anymore without physically feeling sick and crying.

What I am asking of anyone who is willing to reply to this post, who may or may not have any experience with this type of stuff, is HOW DO I STOP EATING WHEN I AM NOT EVEN HUNGRY?? Seriously, I never feel full anymore it's the worst feeling to have a gnawing feeling in my stomach. Food is on my mind all the time, along with how fat I feel I have gotten. I'm really losing hope I feel like I'm going to blow up like a balloon and this is going to last forever..I just want to love my body again, and feel like I can control my eating.. How can I control myself and prevent another episode from happening? I have tried distracting myself, and chewing gum, and going for a walk, etc. etc. etc. Is there anything unique or different I can try or some self-reflection exercises I can try so I can control myself? I have a very impulsive personality, I often don't realize what I've done until half my kitchen is in my endless pit tummy... Sorry for rambling I just want anyone who reads to understand how badly this is effecting my life. If anyone has any tips please let my know, it would mean a great deal.... Thanks all