Hello LOserChyld and welcome to the community. I also would advise therapy. I don't think you are a loser and I don't see you as a failure. I see you as a person going thru a difficult period in your life. I believe underneath all that pain is a bright, wonderful person.

You remind me a little of myself when I was your age in that my parents tried to over shelter me, especially my mom. They meant well but I think the sheltering made it harder for me to get out in the world and face challenges than it would for other people.

Hang in there. I am hoping you will find the help you need to make things better.