Quote:
Originally Posted by L0serChyld
just turned 21 the other day and I was thinking about my high shcool years weren't too bad but weren't too great....I still haven't kissed or even touched a girl and I feel like such a loser. I didnt use the best years of my life to my advantage.
Ever since school ended I've been so ******. All I do is stay home and complain to my friends and I can't do anything no motivation. By the end of this semester I'm going to get kicked out of my uni. I feel so **** because all the weaknesses people can have (weak minded, low physical strength, quiet etc.) I got it. I literally got no strong points and people keep telling me otherwise but I know I don't have many good qualities. I'm been a failure to my parents. I'm an embarrassment to my family. Not looking for sympathy or any of that **** but I just wanna know why I'm so ****ing ******. I'm such a *****. I wish I was never born.
I never learned hard work or giving it all as a kid. My parents kinda spoiled me. I can't even iron my own clothes. And because of this I am entitled and don't really work hard for things. I got dreams but I can't work hard for them. My mum does most things for me still. I'm so ****ing pathetic. IDK what to do. I can't gather the courage to kill myself at times I really don't want to live. I hate my life. It's not that I have it bad because I don't but as a person I feel so unworthy of being on this planet.
I'm a loser.
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All I got to show for myself is a highschool diploma and a few relationships that didn't work out....might as well be a virgin but whatever I've had sex and it was never anything special and none of the relationships worked out so I don't know doesn't feel like any kind of accomplishment. Also though why do clothes need to be ironed? its never even occurred to me to iron laundry so i don't think you should feel like a total failure over that(then again it takes me like 2 days to get a load of laundry done), but yeah I am 25...***** wasn't great when I was 21 either and still isn't. Sort of want to off myself but trying to convince myself I have responsibilities to stick around for and I did win tickets to a concert so I at least want to go to that but its not till the end of the month but even so can't keep that out of my mind so I get that feeling haven't been able to go a day without considering suicide this past month.
sorry I can't really say anything to make you feel better probably but I can relate to some of this...I mean I am on SSi income because I am too mentally f***d to hold a job not exactly the successful first born child my mom wanted.