Hi BrownCurtains, do you think you could tell a member/s of your family a bit about how you're feeling??? I'd completely understand if you found it difficult to talk about everything, but maybe you could start by telling them just a little???
It might even help you to write some things down for them if it's too difficult to talk about things???
I'm just thinking that maybe they could support you a bit more if they knew some of what you're going through, support/help you with "expanding your life" a bit more and/or even support you with getting some professional help if you need that.

Alison