You definitely aren't alone. As the others posted above, I feel a lot the same way. But I would suggest trying to find a way to pay for and seek therapy, it can help so much just to be able to say out loud to someone what's on your mind. Especially someone who won't judge what you say at all.

But then again that's what we're here for. So spout off anytime. I'm listening and there's no judging here.