Hello & Welcome, Twichl. I'm glad you've posted.
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Originally Posted by Twichl
Last spring I had a relatively mild suicidal episode but it ended.
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Have you ever noticed a seasonal aspect to your depression (e.g. spring and fall)?
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Originally Posted by Twichl
Just starting college and just moving to a new location in a new state likely contributed.
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Yes, those are significant potential stressors.
Most colleges/universities these days have resources for students. Would you feel comfortable speaking to counselors there? I imagine you would have to impress on them yours is not a "new" depression.
Please make yourself at home here.
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My dog

mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.