I guess I'd do a heck of a lot of reframing if it were me :-) It looks like you might get some "satisfaction" in the restriction so it's not exactly/purely a restriction? There's nothing inherently "healthy" about calling a T when they're on vacation or leave or whatever, even if they say you can? For me, it would be healthy to not call.

I don't see anything "wrong" with behaviors we truly, 100% like for ourselves or that are "useful" to us (drinking, smoking, etc.) in some way. I don't feel bad/"wrong" for being overweight, it serve(s/d) some need for me and is how I "chose" to do things. I don't feel choosing is all head stuff where one consciously chooses; in believing that we're like icebergs and most of us is "unconscious" then I also have to believe that a lot of my "choices" are unconscious. As my body without my head/thinking is merely opting to stay alive and survive as best it can then I figure it "knows" something that my conscious self might not. . . like that my genes/background say I probably won't get very sick until I'm in my 60's+ and so when I'm having troubles in my 20's and 30's it's probably better to move things into my body and "hope" that I'll have enough time on the other end/inbetween to figure them out and reverse some of any damage?

Funny how smoking and drinking work, when you do stop, things get much better for your body, kind of like when you exercise (and you can improve with exercise even into old age/at any time as evidenced by what assisted living and nursing homes do in that area) and SI leaves scars but not necessarily other damage once it's "dealt" with and the underlying problems resolved, etc.

So, think 5 years down the road or even 1 year and let me know how good/bad not calling your T "this" time is in the entire scheme of things? I think you're doing well, pinksoil, thinking about all these things, working them like a jigsaw puzzle to see how it all fits for you.