My T doesn't tell me to focus on anything. If I am understanding your use of "focus", she is having you see a single, un-moving thing. I visualize were my mind is at and go from there. I work to move myself to where I want to be.

I've used the tappers as well, but my current T sits next to me and alternately taps my hands. I actually prefer it this way. There is a comfort I get from having her next to me.

I suffered through CSA and have had problems with relationships. In EMDR I see my little girl and I walk her through an instance, telling her she is safe now, the bast*** is dead, ....

There is a period of processing that takes place, but it is much easier with my new T.