You know I am sitting here wondering I am worried, frustrated, and feeling weak. And I just found out today that a med I have been taking twice a day which seems to help I will need to change most likely next month because of some law changes in the state (or at least that is what I was told). You know the funny thing is over the last couple of years I took only as needed and even then I didn't probably take as often as I should have. It is only in the past few months that I was taking on a regular basis. Xanax is a controlled substance and I did not want to get hooked to it.

Now that I finally feel comfortable in taking it we will have to find something else I hate always trying to find the right cocktail of meds plus the physical changes I have to get used too when making a switch in medicine or dosage. Thing is I know if I was not taking medication and having therapy I would probably not be here today so it is a necessary evil I guess.

I think it probably took me about 5 years to realize that I most likely will never get off medication which is hard to swallow at times but nothing I can do about it thanks for listening whoever...