I have never reached out to other Bipolar people before, but i feel so alone. I have been in a depression for the last 4 months. My last one lasted over a year. I am confused and I don't trust my mind. I feel like my spouse is going to leave me all the time even though there is no reason for me to think that.

I am getting my doctorate and I work in healthcare. I feel like it's all going to slip away. The love of my life, my job, and school. I am barely making it to work and my school work is suffering.

I have no friends. I realized that I have lived in this city for 16 years and I can't hold on to any friends for very long. I am afraid of people right now.

My Psych MD is good but nothing is working. I am on lithium again but it hasn't kicked in. Nothing works and I just feel like a chemical waste dump being pumped full of psych meds.

I don't know what to do. I have to constantly act like I am ok. At work I go to the bathroom and cry and then come out like everything is fine. It takes so much effort. I am tired...
Any suggestions?