I have a big history in my adolescence of my dad seeing me in the basement monthly and telling me my faults in order to get allowance and to get steered right in life. I used to cry through most of those til I finally asked my dad if there was anything he liked about me. Then he was befuddled and we never met like that again. The room sits emply now but it still has ghosts when I go in there.

The last couple of sessions in therapy my pdoc has confronted me alot and it has been difficult. i have seen him for a long time but he has hit a frustration point or trying to hit something home in me. It is working...

I go back this morning. I am wounded... and have spent this week off keeping busy...trying to put things in perspective. He is right...and I am not feeling too swell about myself.

I am going in actually in the hour so this post is rather late for help but I am already crying and afraid of going. It is like I know I need to go there. I will try to let him know I need to have a break today. Perhaps I hear others talk of wanting a nap in there... this would be a good day for that.... though I do not think it will happen.