I thought my depression was lifting but apparently not as it's gotten worse again, with the additional burden of anxiety this time round. I don't know how long more I can do this and I feel so tired of it all. Not just physically but also a bone-weary mental exhaustion. It's gotten to the point where I am afraid of the night/early morning just because my mood takes a further dip southwards.

I want to cry but I can't even do that because I am so bad at releasing emotions. All I can do is to curl up like a ball on the floor to clear my head. I need T more than ever now but I can't even convey this to her as I'm unable to show dependency either. Haven't seen her in a month and will be terminating in a few more sessions. I'm at a loss as to what to do especially since I'm deep into transference that's not been dealt with.

Sorry for the rant - I didn't know who else to turn to. There's a lot going on with A Levels around the corner and I seriously cannot study in this state. Anyone has any advice? Thank you all in advance.