I feel flat at the moment, usually that would be normal for me, but the anhedonia has been and continues to be severe. Can't even listen to the radio anymore when I drive.

But very frustrated. My PHP didn't work out, I can't find an alternative, I found out from my T that the kind of group I was hoping for most likely doesn't exist in my area, my mom has decided that she has a phd in psychology and wants to dictate my treatment, and my T won't see me the extra visits that I really feel I need.

I've called program upon program looking for alternatives and nothing coming up yet. Found a place out of state, my insurance covers day and outpatient programs, but not inpatient, so by the time you add in housing, it's probably unaffordable.

So a little rough.