Rose, you have been so good to this man, but, when you got away from that and came to the East Coast to visit family, you felt so much better. Do you understand what that means Rose? It means you need to be away from this constant caregiving situation because it is "draining you" in every way.

The condition of this man that you are discribing means he should be in a home now Rose. Your devotion to him has become "codependent" Rose and that is just not good for you. You are very strong minded and "loyal" but, you have to be loyal to yourself too.
When his child visits him you need to be honest about how he is too much work for you now. This "no end in sight" is just not fair to "you" now Rose and if you are ready to "explode" you need to pay attention to that, that is stress building up in you, not good for "your" health and well being Rose.

If you need permission to take the next step, I will say to you, please take the next step, you "are worth it". Your being ready to explode is your body and mind telling you this stress is too much now on you.

(((Caring Hugs)))
OE