So I had a little awkward moment earlier...about 3 hrs. after I made my last post here. Been feeling bad all day, as I mentioned, weather and all that, but also because I've been feeling on the verge of tears for a straight week now and yet haven't been able to cry. But anyway...for all the first part of the day I hadn't eaten, so I was feeling pretty irritable on top of all my other feelings...near the end of it I was getting a bit light-headed, feeling sick, not able to focus on anything, and also had a headache. So that was even more misery piled on top of my usual daily misery, which made for a pretty big heap of miserableness. It was at the worst of this misery that my mom came into my room with coupons and asked me what I would like to eat because my grandpa had agreed to give her a ride to Burger King. I told her I wanted chicken, and she was like "Chiken? Really?" like that was the nastiest thing she'd ever heard. So yes, I grew impatient. Told her to get whatever she wanted, I didn't care anymore. I know it's ridiculous, but I felt judged and demeaned, like, can I not even have a say in what I want for dinner? I know...stupid thing to get upset over. But I hadn't eaten all day, like I said, and I wasn't feeling normal. So then my mom starts cutting coupons while sitting on my bed, and suddenly I feel this hot rush of burning tears come on, and so I stand up real quick and walk over to a corner with my back turned so my mom wouldn't see me, 'cause I was embarrassed. However, looking back I know she must have noticed because I wasn't hiding it very well. I kept wiping my eyes and sniffling. Yet she made no move to comfort me. So then my grandpa's horn blares from outside, Mom stood up and said "Bye" and I said "Bye" in this really shaky voice. I know she had to have noticed. Anyway, she came back with the chicken I wanted and I finally got to eat. But I've been feeling wobbly all day. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me, I just feel so thrown in a loop if that makes any sense. I feel unstable - not unstable as in having sui thoughts because I'm not at the moment. More unstable like I don't know what my depression will have me doing next...