thanks for the reply guys, such a relief to know there are other people that can relate to how I'm feeling and give me some help. I'm finding it really hard to deal with lately.. especially communicating my feelings with those around me, my partner doesn't understand at all and just calls me weird or doesn't know how to handle it when i have a bad phase.
I've tried some mindfulness but i feel like i just create monsters in my own head that i can't seem to get rid of. I've tried yoga but found that was something that made it worse, its like i almost can't be left alone with my own mind and thoughts because i dig myself deeper and deeper into negative thoughts. it does feel a lot better to just let it out and write a nice long paragraph having a bit of a whinge, haha.
Your answers have helped a lot, i am going to go back and see my psychiatrist ASAP to get this in order!