I have found "In Session" that Stopdog referenced to be useful to me when I was trying to understand transference. Not everything in that book resonated with me but enough that gave me insight into the process. I found I was more able to relax into trusting my T while also maintaining my own boundaries after reading that book.

I have had several people recommend to me Drama of the Gifted Child, but have not read it.

For incest, I benefited from Miss America by Day, written by a former Miss America who was sexually abused by her father. There are definitely things about that book that I don't like, but it was helpful to me at a critical stage in my progress.

I'm curious about The Trauma Myth book. I just looked the description up on Amazon and there are parts of it that immediately make sense to me. For the most part, I do not feel afraid of my abuser, but confused by the complete and total denial that surrounded the abuse. I might check this book out.