So sorry to read, you've been going through all of this.

I strongly believe that trust in relationships goes beyond jealous reasons. For instance, your need for affection and affirmations, is left unfulfilled. In turn, self esteem takes the first fall. Then, while trying to sort out, why one feels so cruddy in the relationship, lack of trust grows.
If a relationship isn't leaving one feeling good about themselves, it grows unhealthy. Then it becomes a viscous struggle.
Though your own behaviour might not display actions that are loving and trusting, checking the phone and messages, is an example. His inability to meet halfway, also develops his own unhealthy behavior, recording you for a later time? Where he'd take that recording, is the indicator of where struggling lies.
I get, his point of refusing to give up a friendship, slippery slope, leads to feeling oppressed, at the same time, beyond just stating nothing is going on, your needs being unmet isn't being addressed by him, in a mature manner. No compromise mentioned.

How are things, today?

I just noticed, this was posted in March, sometimes, with the moderation of new posters, this may have posted and bumped below a slew of other threads, is my impression of what appears a minor technical glitch?

Thinking of you, with concern. Sending ((((gentle hugs))))